Found this in my pile of “stories that didn’t make the cut” and it was quite a trip down the emotion lane of how it was, when I just got my own place and how it is not. So I though I should share it with you, maybe somebody is freaking out about moving in alone like I was at some point… if so, dig in 🙂
June 22nd, 2016
22 days ago I finally moved in my own apartment.
Nobody warns you about how hard it is to actually MOVE. It’s not just packing. There are so many elements you need – a car, somebody who will help you to carry everything. You need to sign papers and call utility services, suddenly there are about million things you need to buy for living. Then there’s first night on the floor trying to get some sleep. For the first couple of weeks feeling helpless and tired to ask for a help all the time.
There’s something to note about being single and moving in a new place – you have to know how to deal with many manly things. I don’t even have a screwdriver or a hammer to put a painting on the wall (not that my landlord allows me to do that). But you’re free to deal with that, you’re free to do anything really.
I have adorable 1 half empty room, a kitchen that needs some work and a list of “to dos”. In reality I have about 2 hours every night to do something about it. My life’s crazy at the moment. I feel so many things at once – pressure, grief, amusement, happiness, stress, tiredness, loneliness. Can’t wait for the day to come when everything will be in place. I will have a bed and all the tools you need to fix everything.
UPDATE February 20th, 2017
It gets easier, especially after having a good night sleep in a real bed. 🙂 But it’s never really fully done. Like now – most of the things I need I have slowly gathered, but still – sitting on a laundry basket, when my friends come over for a glass of wine, waking up with those bright lights that hit my “no curtain” apartment, hesitating to decide whether to paint the walls in my bedroom and still whisking whipped cream with an oldschool method, because there’s still no mixer in my kitchen. And that’s okay, since it has never been about buying everything NOW, but more about having the RIGHT elements for my place. My friends even call it the perfect Pinterest lifestyle. I call it my safe haven.
So for what it’s worth, if you’re at the place in your life, when you’re starting fresh or just moving in your first apartment , know that it’s perfectly normal to not to have shit together right on the spot. I mean, you can’t really know everything before you get to really feel the place and it’s character. Feng Shui calls it the chi or the flow of the energies, for me it’s the feeling of the space and materials. My advice: breath in, breath out and just chill. Eventually you will know what, when and how.
Enjoy it, it’s truly an amazing journey!